Dhaam Ke Meethe Bhath

In the foothills of the Himalayas, laid a small yet gorgeous town, Mandi. The town was straight out of a Ruskin Bond novel, with lush green trees, blooming bright flowers, a flowing cold river with chirping birds and grazing cows around. There wasn’t any clamour of heavily treading vehicles nor any smoke from industries. The place was resided in by simple people, leading even simpler lives. There wasn’t luxury but there was peace, there wasn’t the comfort of cushions but the people of Mandi woke and slept in the arms of nature.

The population of Mandi was either engaged in small businesses or in service for shops/farms in their own or nearby villages. Both ways, the people of Mandi had limited resources at their disposal, contributing towards a life that was slow and all wrapped in humility. Amongst all the people that were a part of the village, there was a beautiful family living by the stream.

Rampal Tehran was a 30-year-old man who was born and brought up in Mandi. His ancestors too, belonged to Himachal Pradesh and worked in the fruit farms of wealthy land owners for years. Continuing the tradition, Rampal began working in the vast farmland of the Mehrotra’s, after finishing high school from the village. He was soon married to his aunt’s neighbour’s daughter, Roop. Matching up the standards of Rampal’s fair complexion and 6-feet tall height, Roop herself, was a lovely girl with small, green eyes and long, traight brown hair. After marrying Rampal, Roop too began working at the Mehrotra farmland to help her husband with some extra income. A year after their wedding, Roop gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. The couple knew no boundaries of joy at the birth of their daughter, Roohi. Both Rampal and Roop, spent all their time with their daughter, playing with her by the river, taking her to the village mela, teaching her native rhymes and songs and putting her to bed. Their lives were devoted to their young girl and each-other. Theirs was a family that everyone only had blessings for.

With Rampal’s unimaginable affection and Roop’s obsessive care, Roohi grew up into the most endearing, chubby little girl. At around 5:30 in the morning, Rampal used to wake up and walk down to the riverside to fill up 2 buckets of water for the day. On his way back home, he bought half a litre of milk from the dairy for Roohi from the previous day’s savings. After reaching home at around 6, he would place his hand on Roop’s forehead, signalling that it was time to wake up. Then, both Roop and Rampal would together clean their warm, one-room house, keep the pots of daliya and tea on the stove and finish their everyday chores. They would do all of this in hushes and murmurs so as to not wake Roohi. Exactly at 7:30, Rampal woke Roohi up while Roop readied three plates and cups for the family. In utmost agony, Roohi opened her eyes as her deep sleep broke. With sleep-laden eyes and a grumpy face, she sat on the floor with her parents and gulped down the sweet porridge and tea. “When will I cook for you and baba?”, Roohi asked Roop eveyrtime the three sat together for breakfast. Whenever Roop sat down by the stove to make simple yet delectable meals, Roohi always stood by a distance and admired her mother dearly. Although Rampal and Roop dreamt of educating Roohi into a police officer, little did they know that their girl dreamt only of jumping into her bed for a long, deep sleep and of cooking hot Pahadi Mutton for her parents. After dropping Roohi off to the village school, Rampal and Roop rushed to the farms and worked extremely hard the entire day to make ends meet. Sama Begum, their 60-year old neighbour lived alone and had the leisure time to pick Roohi from school. In the hills, the sun set sooner than other places, leaving the small town of Mandi in the blanket of darkness, unprotected from chilly winds. Roop and Rampal came back home from the farms just before the sun set.

Surrounded with endless forests from each side, it wasn’t safe to be out in the streets at the time of dusk in Mandi. Sama begum, the only source of town gossip for Roop, usually sat with her over tea and narrated tales of robberies, rapes, murders, accidents and other mishaps in the town. Which is why, all the residents finished their work of the outside world well before the sunset and spent the cold evenings locked up in their warm, cosy huts with kehwas and chicken stews.

Life kept passing by, with Roohi’s giggles and snuggles. With the simplest of needs and modest of dreams, Rampal and his family barely complained of having less money. They were content with the little they had and that was enough to keep the wheels of their lives moving. Roohi was now 7 years old, who no longer had to be woken up by Rampal nor had to cared for excessively. She was now a big girl who loved helping around the house, accompanying her father to fetch milk and water, cleaning the mud pavement outside, chatting with Sama Begum and also learning to make tea for her parents. Roohi was now truly a big girl.

It was one of the coldest nights of the year on December 18th. The sun had set sooner than it usually did. Sama begum and Roohi were sipping tea, occasionally peeping on the other side of the road to see if they could already spot Rampal and Roop returning from work. “Don’t worry, you finish your Maths homework, there’ll be here anytime soon. You know it is the time when berries are flushed into jam jars. The farm is bustling with activity. I am sure they must be tied up with work.”, said Sama begum. “Sama Begum, amma has been unusually tired these days. I am certain that the work has taken a toll on her. Baba also talks lesser than usual. How about I surprise them with Kehwa and Meethe Bhaath today? You could help me and we could all eat tonight’s dinner together.”, suggested an excited Roohi. With immeasurable love and caution, Roohi made her first ever pot of Meethe Bhath, a dish that the entire family ate on days of celebration or on the days when Roohi was sad. The entire room filled up with the aroma of jaggery and rice while on the other side Sama Begum readied the kehwa. Racing around the hut, Roohi firstly laid a mat on the floor and then slowly placed pots on it. “Everything is ready. They are still not here. I am starving. They never have been so late.” “How about you eat now and once your parents are back from the farms, you can share some more with them?” No, Sama dadu. I’ll eat with Baba and amma only.”

Rampal and Roop hurried from work, knowing that they were quite late and Roohi was alone at home. Just as they were rushing down the hillside towards the town, they heard howls of wolves. “Wolves! These are wolves, Rampal. We will be killed.” “There is no need to panic, we can easily manipulate them in the dark and find our way home safely. And you never know, these can be wild dogs too.” Both their hearts sank in fear, their skins turned cold and pale as the stark darkness only grew and the howls intensified. But only to protect the other from the claws of fear and hopelessness, none of them worded the real situation that struck them. “My Roohi! Will I ever be able to wrap her in my arms? I don’t think so. No! I didn’t know today morning was the last time I sat with my innocent daughter for our last tea together. Rampal, what will she do without us? Where will she go?” Rampal could not process anything. All he knew was that they had to run and run as fast as they could. In moments of horror, they misjudged the end of the slope. In less than a second, they both slipped down the hills, their hands entangled.

There was an eerie silence around the hills after that. No cries, no howls, no thud from the falling. The place was enveloped in a mournful quiet.

Back in the hut, Roohi covered her cold face with Roop’s shawl. She could smell her mother’s fragrance and that itself was comforting enough for her to continue waiting for them to return. The night became endless as a scared Roohi, with teary eyes and shivering hands, sat by the door with Sama Begum, waiting for her parents to come back. The hot pot of Meethe Bhaath went cold and odourless. “We’ll eat when they come back. Don’t worry Sama Begum, we can heat the pot up and they’ll be hot and nice again. My first Dhaam ke Meethe Bhaath. Mummy and Baba must be so hungry.”, murmured the little Roohi.

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Where Hate Triumphs Over Love

Have you ever paused to ponder over the riveting conflict between societal approvals for love versus hate? Why is that being in love always invites dubious reactions from not only the society but familial responses are pretty much similar too. Often, we all come across innumerable instances where communities stand strongly united while waging combats based on hate or revenge. However, rarely do we spot cases where people show solidarity towards those in love, especially when their prospective partners come riding from a cultural world that is different than theirs. A point that is beyond any contention is the fact that reaching your love destination in a culture like ours is no carousel ride. There is an ocean of hurdles to clear before one can finally settle down with the partner of their choice. What one needs through this tough ride, is the resilience to spring right back from societal pressures and strengthen the tusk to hold your assertiveness high. It is integral to continue reminding people that for once, objecting hate can be the right thing to do but objecting love, under no circumstance should be sanctioned correct. Love is a feeling to be celebrated. Parents must be proud when their children fall in love with someone outside their families. Isn’t it absolutely admirable to see your child having the heart and ability to contain love for somebody else, without conditions and beyond selfishness? Ask, pause and ask again. What’s wrong? Love or hate?

Let’s break down the above paragraph to form relatable pieces. Proclaiming your love for someone in our culture will blatantly invite absurd/aggressive reactions from families, especially elders. What is astonishing is the fact that a feeling as incredible as love, a feeling as pure as love and a feeling as rarely gifted as love can lead to such painful consequences. From a simple “How dare you?” to horrifying instances of murder, what is cleverly covered in terms like ‘honor killing’, love sees it all. Again, what for? Why is it so problematic to be in love? How can love harm anything or anybody? Love in the maximum that it can bring, can only bring hope, compassion, humanity and prosperity back in the lives of robots-turned-humans. Banishing love is killing all of these prospects.

Meanwhile, hate between two people, two communities or even two nations, rarely calls upon such dire reactions. It again is truly unfortunate how easily one learns to accept hate, finds all terrifying or toxic ways to deal with it. People readily join hands to become accomplices in hate. Well, even if they don’t, the war that is waged against Love is never waged against Hate. It might be waged for it, though.

Notably, love as an emotion is too powerful as blessing to be bestowed on just anybody. You will notice through the journey of life that very few people have had the privilege to fall in love. The feeling is supremely deep and can fit in only in hearts that have bigger spaces, only in souls that are full of light, only in minds that contain real intellect and only in people who are Beautiful. Beautiful enough to be able to feel an emotion like that, to make space for it and to be able to accept it, more so, own it and announce it. The latter phases demand for courage that very fewer from the few possess. The ultimate miracle is to receive love for the love you give. This doesn’t happen humanely. It’s beyond the work of an ordinary being, it’s a miracle sent from the heavens. Now when you block a bond that was built somewhere beyond human contemplation, you are committing nothing less than a sin. To object love, is to object the power of the Unknown and Unseen.    

On the contrary, one fuming inference is that hate is such a shallow of an emotion, that it can find it’s space in the smallest hearts with the littlest space, in brains that haven’t learned the real wisdom, in souls that are dark and void and in people that are Evil.

Sit back and question. How and Why would you object love. How and Why would you rather not object hate from taking birth in the hearts of your children. How can you allow hate as a reaction to be followed after love? Love happens to only the brightest, be proud that you have the ability to experience it. Truly hope that we reach a time where hate never triumphs over love again. Love deserves to win. Every time. It deserves to be celebrated and not feared. Every time.

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Kabhi Sochna

Jis hotel mein apni shaamein manaane jaate ho,

Zara gaur se dekhna kabhi waha maujood logo ko.

Apne table se nazrein uthakar,

Kabhi dekhna waha log aur bhi hain.

Uss shaam ko raushan karne mein,

Kuch log aur bhi hain.

Woh waiter jo apne ghamo ko bhula kar,

Bass muskurakar tumhari shaam ko yaadgaar banata hai.

Thodi si deri yaa choti si galti ho jaane par,

Tumse padi huyi daant ke baad bhi,

Nazrein jhuka kar, bass apna kaam karta jaata hai.

Na jaane kinn haalaton ko ghar par chhod kar,

Na jaane kitni khushiyo ke mauke bhool kar,

Apni rozi roti kamane ke maqsad se,

Bass tumhari hi khushiyon ko door se apna sa bana leta hai.

Kabhi sochna uske baare mein,

Jo tumhari shaamo ko, hass ke, apna sa bana leta hai.

Fir sochna uss boodhe aadmi ke baare mein bhi,

Jo puraani si uniform pehne huye,

Darwaaze pe khada tumhari jagmati surato ko salaam karta jaata hai.

Usne bhi kaha socha hoga ki saari zingadi, woh gairo ko izzat farmayega,

Magar fir bhi har subah kaam par woh bhi toh chala aata hai.

Kabhi sochna unn sabke baare mein bhi,

Jinke baare mein tumne kabhi sochna bhi zaroori nahi samjha.

Woh bhi toh aakhir log hi hain,

Jinhe tumne kabhi log samjha hi nahi.

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Making the Best of Moments: Moment Marketing

In a world that sprints through the mad rat race of the 21st century, how would you survive, let alone stay relevant. We truly live in an era where everything around us transforms itself into something absolutely new, within no time. The relevance of constants has become undoubtedly questionable. Hence, it is becoming of utmost importance for not only individuals but also for brands to continuously mold themselves in accordance with latest trends. With technology sprinting in an equally developmental pace, it is only the perfect blend for businesses to take advantage of it and accomplish their profitable ambitions.

Marketing is a critical segment of any organization for innumerable reasons. It not only enables the Sales department to bring in revenue for the company, but it also dives into the pool of immaterial aspects of growth. Firstly, it develops a loyal consumer base by defining the brand image of the company. It creates awareness about the brand and its products/services in the most amicable way, that in turn catalyzes sales while also building goodwill of the organization for the longer run. No matter how technologically-sound the marketing department is, one cannot underestimate the criticality of keeping up with the requirements of potential consumers.

Consumers today, want to feel associated and engaged with the brand on a personal level. They want marketing campaigns that go far beyond only advertising their products. Audiences have become extremely mindful of the content they absorb. Let the content be in any way unrelated to their needs, the audience dismisses it immediately. Marketing campaigns need to loop in societal issues, latest trends and consumer interests in their campaigns. They have to be effective in a way that they engulf content that will most readily be accepted by their target audience while also being critically approved.

One of the most truly efficient ways of staying relevant in the present is to adapt to the moment. This is where Moment Marketing comes in for brands. Moment Marketing, just as the name suggests, basically means to market one’s brand while keeping in line with what’s happening at the moment. It ensures that the narratives of campaigns are carefully weaved in, complying to the present happenings around their physical space. In the social media culture, operating on Moment Marketing has become extremely convenient, cost efficient and time saving. How? Well, you can follow everyday trends across the globe and turn around your product campaigns around them. Subsequently, you can deliver them by the click of a button, yet reach millions of people. In doing so, you can use social media platforms and deliver your campaigns as posts, tweets, lives, memes, quotes, etc.

Moment Marketing as a discipline has gained momentum not only in developed countries but also in India. It might be a point of conjecture that Moment Marketing is possible only with the assistance of social media. But that’s not true. While social media surely makes the whole process a lot easier but Moment Marketing has existed way before the advent of internet. One Indian brand that has been putting this discipline to use is, everybody’s favorite, Amul. Amul’s marketing and advertisement campaigns, always have one thing in common, which is a little girl wearing a Polka Dots frock. However, if you carefully observe the narratives of Amul, they are always in accordance with the recent happenings. If the Indian Cricket Team wins a match, the little Amul girl will be posing around a cricket victory theme. Amul did most of its Moment Marketing using hoardings, posters, packaging and television advertising.

Today, when everything gets its due validation only on the web, brands take no time to link their marketing campaigns with viral trends. During the monsoons, OTT brands like Netflix, lure users to watch shows or movies that involve rains in their plot or they simply play with the cognitive abilities of consumers by pitching to them, the idea of rains, snuggles and a good movie with some popcorn! Food companies like Swiggy and Zomato would, at the same time, offer discounts to incite purchases for a list of food items that are a must-have with rains. Rains are just the lighter aspects that businesses can cover while pursuing Moment Marketing.

In my opinion, brands should not shy away from taking up bolder challenges in their pursuit of this magnificent discipline. A discipline that allows a business to connect with its target audience on such a personal level, must be put to the best use. Marketeers must aim to tap the emotive senses of people through their campaigns, as they continue promoting their brands. Campaign narratives have the power to turn around perspectives and infuse positive changes in the society. With Moment Marketing, every grave issue of the society can be touched upon, backed with facts and crowd sensitivity. Marketeers know their way to influence, they must do it for the most incredible cause after all.

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Kya Papa Bhi Kabhi Boodhe Ho Sakte Hai?

Dheere dheere unke kaale baal safed hone lage hai,

Baat karte huye achanak ruk kar kuch sochne lagte hai,

Chashmah khud maathe par tika kar; fir poore ghar mein dhoondne lagte hai,

Dhoop mein newspaper padhte huye; baithe baithe so jaate hai,

Log kehte hai umar ho rahi hai tumhare papa ki,

Par unhe kya pata mere papa kabhi boodhe thodi ho sakte hai.

Ab pehle ki tarah samose kachori nahi khaa paate hai,

Diabetes hone ke bawajood chupkar mithayi churate hai,

Chhote bacho ki tarah baat baat par zidd karte hai, ladte hai,

Bazaar tak jaakar bhi thakaan se choor ho jate hai,

Fir khud hi kehte hai “Ab umar ho gayi hai shayad”,

Par papa ko bhi kya pata ki mere papa kabhi boodhe ho hi nahi sakte hai.

Pata nahi aaj kal sabke insurance details kyu bhejne lage hai,

Chaahe gaadi chalana ho yaa bank jaana,

Ab mujhe aagey karne lage hai.

Baar baar bolte hai seekh lo ab yeh sab, samajho yeh sab,

Umar ho rahi hai tumhare papa ki, kal naa bhi hu toh tumhe aana chahiye,

Unki baat ko sune bina hi keh deti hu,” Papa aap kabhi boodhe ho hi nahi sakte hai.”

Agar bewaqt so jaaye yaa do baar bulane par bhi jawab na de,

Toh mujhe bhi ajeeb si ghabrahat hone lagti hai,

Gehri neend mein jab bacho ki tarah unhe sota dekhti hu,

Tab kabhi kabhi sochti hu ki kahi papa sach mein boodhe toh nahi hone lage hai,

Par fir yun hi khud ko firse mana leti hu,

Nahi nahi! Tere papa kabhi boodhe ho hi nahi sakte hai.

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The Qureshi Palace

Everything had changed in Shehzadpur. When Qureshi had left the village, it was merely an extended agricultural farm with a handful of huts inhabiting the place, without even a sign of development. Today, almost 15 years later, the serene village had transformed into a hustling town, engulfing all the neighboring villages. Sardaar Bishan Singh’s only ayurvedic clinic was taken over by acquisitive private doctors, who mostly worked with fake medical degrees. The roadside fritters’ carts now were shops that sold spicy burgers and noodles. There now stood a cinema hall built by the village contractor. Everything had changed in Shehzadpur, thought Qureshi.

It was 15 years ago that Qureshi had scammed a city dweller to buy a passport and a forged visa. He desperately wanted to escape the clutches of poverty. He was exhausted of watching his wife, Reshma Begum and five children sleep hungry every night. His four sons, Abdul, Karim, Javed and Raza along with his only daughter Hayaat, were shrinking of starvation every single day. There was no means of earning a livelihood. Farming for the landowner didn’t even provide for a week’s food, let alone one whole month. On somedays, like the birthdays of his children, Qureshi resorted to repairing buses of Punjab Roadways in order to purchase anything that would make for a celebration at his home. In the scorching heat of Punjab, he laid down under the buses, bruising and blackening his skin only to buy some chicken or Halwa for his family. Under these circumstances, survival seemed to be a difficult feat to achieve. Therefore, failing to find a dignified way of life in Shehzadpur, Qureshi escaped to the Middle East. His friend Rehmaan, who had been settled there for decades now, had assured him the job of a security guard at one of the mansions in Saudi Arabia.

Leaving behind his family for an unsettling span of time was not easy, especially considering that all of them meant more than his own life to him. It was indeed for them that he was leaving. With his heart soaring with pain, Qureshi left to play cards with his destiny, to see who wins between his fate and him. A man as well built and tall as him, was best suited to take care of Khwaab, the mansion where an old couple, the Sayyeds lived. Jamaal Sayyed was over 80 years of age and his wife was nearly 75. They both were partially paralyzed due to an accident where they had lost their only daughter. It was a lonely house. The husband and wife, barely spoke to each other and it was only Qureshi who broke the deafening silence of the house by narrating the intriguing stories of India to the couple. They began enjoying his company. But moreover, they began trusting him. For they had seen, in spite of being aware of their weak and incapable bodies, Qureshi never misused his freedom. He was mighty, yet loyal. He devoted his time in taking care of the mansion as if it were his own house. He went beyond his assigned duties of a guard and ended up making chicken stew for the couple on many winter nights. In return, he was able to send a hefty amount to his family, at the end of every month. Years went by. After the death of his wife, Mr. Sayyed became bed stricken. He lost all his strength and now completely depended on Qureshi for something even as small as holding a spoon. Without an heir for his manganous wealth, Mr. Sayyed gave everything away to Qureshi before finally passing away to a fatal case of pneumonia. Qureshi was now the possessor of 10 crore rupees besides the mansion, Khwaab and The Sayyed Chemicals in Saudi. He now wasn’t just a man who had fled from Punjab in search of some money, he was now Dawood Qureshi. The Dawood Qureshi.

After he arrived back in Shehzadpur, he was a new man. His aura had transformed into a magnet that could attract anybody who met him. People were in awe of him , looking for the reason behind his unbelievable success. There were all sorts of conjectures. Some said he had murdered a wealthy couple in Saudi to steal their money while some said he had married a lonely rich woman back in the Middle East. But Dawood shut every blabber with the vigor of his money. He indulged in limitless charities, sent his boys away to Saudi for them to take care of the Sayyed Chemicals and Khwaab, got his daughter married in Dubai and began building his own palace in Shehzadpur. In no time, the barren lane of his house was bought by his men. The lane was then covered with four magnificently royal bungalows that Dawood built, all adjacent to one another. By the side of these gigantic red palaces, was a bank branch that Qureshi bought, bribing some officials. Right opposite the central bungalow, Qureshi built a mosque. A mosque so beautiful that it could make your eyes gape endlessly at it, it could make you standstill in sheer amazement and it could bring you unimaginable placidity. With expensive glasswork and a colorful fountain in the center, the mosque had a gorgeous verandah where small children attended their everyday madrassa classes. Exactly behind his bungalows, were vast fields of mustard, where tiny yellow flowers bloomed and where life also lived.

Qureshi was 65 years old by this time. His limbs began growing weaker, his shoulders stooped and his heart turned older, inviting multiple chronic diseases. But Qureshi wouldn’t stop. There was still so much to do. Only now he finally had the authority where people bowed at his glimpse, his orders were followed swiftly and he ruled. He ruled Shehzadpur. It was then that he made his mind to enter politics to become Dawood, the leader. He won elections one after the other and multiplied his wealth beyond limits. The entire Punjab shook with wonder when Qureshi got his youngest son married. The bride was landed from a chopper at Shehzadpur’s school ground. The magic didn’t cease there, thousands of villagers gathers to catch a glimpse of the diamond laden young bride from Dubai, whose lehenga was furnished with jewels from across the globe. This was Dawood Qureshi’s supremacy.

The next few years for the family were blissful when Sana, the youngest and the only daughter in law who was living with them, gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. Qureshi knew no boundaries of happiness and began spending more time at home, watching his granddaughter, Firdaus grow. He refused to send her to the local school, blaming the wild boys of the town and insisted that her learning must curtail to her 4’o clock madrassa classes. When his power began slipping from his hands and his party was about to lose the elections, now, 70 years old, Qureshi bought victory for 5 crore rupees in cash. Everybody went quiet knowing that the tiger was still not old and knew how to still hold his power. But in truth, the tiger had gone weak, so much so, that now he couldn’t be out of his house for very long. Besides his heart, now his lungs too were losing their strength. Firdaus, the tiny chubby girl with her pink cheeks had stopped complaining of not being able to go to school. She felt sorry for her old grandfather’s inability to even retaliate now.

One night before going to sleep, Qureshi informed his wife Reshma about a journalist’s visit, scheduled for the next day. He was ecstatic and with childlike enthusiasm told her that he was being interviewed by this young journalist from Chandigarh’s magazine. “She will do a lifetime feature on me.” He told Reshma Begum. Gulping a handful of pills for keeping his body alive, Qureshi went to sleep. Next morning rose with a different glow. The sun was shining brighter but it wasn’t hot. The breeze was cold and Reshma had already instructed the servants to prepare for the Dawaat. It was her husband’s big day and she was spot on as his supporter, as his wife. Firdaus ran to her grandfather’s room with a cup of tea like she did every day. But Qureshi won’t even move in spite of her joyous shrieks. He laid still as a stone. “Dadijaan, dadajaan won’t wake up!” And Qureshi just won’t move. He was in the lap of eternal sleep.

The town stopped that day, all shops shut and everybody gathered outside the Qureshi lane that began with a huge hoarding that read ‘You are welcome to The Qureshi Palace’. The journalist’s car arrived, brushing the crowd away. The young lady from the city, cluelessly, walked in the house and realized what had happened. Firdaus and Sana were inconsolable over Qureshi’s death. But Reshma didn’t bat an eyelid. Just when the journalist was preparing to leave, Reshma signaled her to wait and said, “Welcome to the Qureshi Palace. Please have a seat and enjoy your sherbet. You have come to write about my husband, Mr. Qureshi. He conquered everything he set his eye at and this feature was something, his heart beamed for. His final desire will not go unfulfilled. You have come to feature the tiger; his tigress will narrate his tale to you. Sana, call the party workers and tell them the 5-crore deal to win the elections won’t go in vain. Reshma Begum is ready to hold her husband’s chair. And Sana, send our men to the town school and register my Firdaus’s name. She will go to school from tomorrow. Nobody can dare to even set an eye on a girl from The Qureshi Palace. Let that be known.”

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The Female Fate and Familial Responses

If you are a woman especially in a country which is grounded in hypocritical morals, your life won’t be easy. Every now and then you will be slapped with a reminder that you aren’t a boy. That you are a girl who is expected to behave in a certain way. These expectations evolve and transform through the stages of your life, the background that you are born and raised in, the profession you pick and the partner you choose to marry. Expectations thrown at you and the judgements you are bashed with, transition, but never cease. 

A little girl who is merely 5 years of age, is subtly taught the difference between a boy and a girl. She is gradually molded into a person who fears this difference. From “good girls shouldn’t play with boys” to “you should learn sit properly”, from the very start of their lives, girls are systematically shown that they belong to the ‘weaker’ section of the community. My question is, how many boys are brought up with similar ideologies? How many boys are told that the good ones shouldn’t play with girls or that they should learn to sit and stand the right way? It broke my heart, threw me in a state of mental brawl when I overheard a conversation of some guests that we hosted for dinner, a few days ago. While speaking about children in our society who majorly fall in the age group 10-15, the couple began commenting on a 14-year-old girl. “She always has a phone in her hand and strolls exactly where the boys are playing cricket. She dresses up as if she is going to a party and has been seen laughing with some of the boys on various occasions. We wonder if the parents even care that their girl is so “CHARACTERLESS”. We have strictly asked our daughters to not befriend her as we are certain she would prove to be a bad influence.”

It genuinely left me shattered to come to terms with the fact that a 14-year-old girl can be labelled to be characterless for giggling around boys who were either of her age or probably even younger than her. This is the society we live in. So, if you think that the society has moved away from discriminating between genders and has equaled girls to boys, you are mistaken. Like I said, if you are a girl, irrespective of your urban or rural belongingness, you will be reminded of your gender every instance of your life. Nobody bothers to respect your privacy, especially when you are a woman.

 The worst is revealed when families are complicit in this hateful bias. It is disappointing when a father himself starts fearing the perspectives of society. Indeed, appalling when the way a girl’s life is nurtured based on what people will say or think.

The discrimination flows into every aspect of a woman’s life, so much so, that one article won’t be able to contain the innumerable instances. It only leads me to wonder what would it be like when the response to these discriminatory actions changes? What would it be like when those who talk about a woman or the way she lives her life, aren’t paid heed to? What would it be like if the fathers held their heads high over the individuality and choices of their daughters? I believe that shifting the dynamics of responses towards sexism and misogyny will restrict their impact. While women are fiercely powerful to fight their own battles and give a befitting reply to those who pull them down, if parents stop playing the ‘fear and escape’ games with the society, their girls will be further empowered. A “We know what she does, and we are proud of her.” from parents will go a long way in stitching loose mouths.

It is for parents to also remember that nobody makes them answerable to the people who have nothing to do with their lives except for commenting. What is needed is some faith in thenvalues that you have raised your children with, and nobody has the right to make you doubt them. It is your world and her world within it, it is your life and her life around yours, it is your happiness and her happiness, only. Not theirs. Don’t allow them to make you or your daughter live on their terms and most importantly, don’t let them come in between yours or daughter’s happiness. Remember, everybody, everybody finds a way to live their lives with their choices. The only difference is, some have the courage to walk out in the open, fearlessly, and do what they truly want without worrying about the world, while the others, hide away from the public eye and live a dual life where they lie, betray and do everything ‘immoral’ to only steal their moments of joy and then  get back to their regular business of passing judgements.

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Log Kya kahenge?

You are wearing a skirt and holding a glass of wine,

Going out for dinner at 8? Better be back by 9;

Why can’t you be friends with just girls?

And what’s with these inviting curls?

Why have trouble with marriage prospects over higher education?

How are you even thinking of sending her alone on a vacation?

I saw her coming back late in the night,

Her parents surely didn’t raise her right.

And why is your make up so bright?

Why do you so often change your display pictures?

Don’t act too smart, meddling in mature fixtures.

Sending your girl for career to another city?

Poor parents! Won’t even know and she’ll soon start playing too witty.

And why are you strolling alone in the dark?

Don’t complain then, when those dogs bark.

Divorce? Oh she must have been an unfaithful, controlling wife,

He wouldn’t even know and she’d cut him with her sly knife.

Talks too much and smiles with red lips?

Trust us, these are just her alluring tricks and tips.

Standing with a group of guys?

Calls them friends? Huh! Just her lies.

You have no morals if you’ve dared to fall in love,

You are characterless if your dress too short or blouse too deep,

You must have slept your way up the ladder if you’ve tasted success,

And every step of your life you are asked, “Log kya kahenge?”

But girl, tell them you are a woman of unimaginable might,

Tell them you’ve learnt to give them a tough fight.

Walk on and be all you can be,

Unapologetic and unabashedly free.

The next time they say, “Log Kya kahenge?”,

Tell them, “Kuch toh kahenge, unka ka kaam hi hai kehna.”

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Howls Of The Helpless

It is spreading like fire with consequences that are dire,

There are screams everywhere and cries desperate,

Even precautions now are in vain; each escape going down the drain,

Let us live one more day; please now just go away.

Television brings fear and newspapers? Oh dear!

Lined up ambulances; cremation awaiting corpses,

Hospital lines are jammed; the world is damned,

Let us live more day; please now just go away.

We fear when our fathers go to work, cause we can really see you lurk,

Can’t see our people so helpless; God, how could you be so heartless?

Please, please don’t let anymore mothers cry who have to see their children die,

Our streets now smell of blood; is this the deads’ flood?

Let us live one more day; please now just go away.

The government too has turned its wits away; oh! there’s left no ray,

Our doctors are weeping; death rates are only leaping,

Ambulance drivers are now clueless; this virus is unbearably ruthless,

Let us live one more day; please now just go away.

Don’t take away parents from little children,

Don’t separate husbands from their wives,

Please don’t destroy any more families,

Let us live one more day; please now just go away.

We don’t have any beds left; vaccines are being lost in theft,

Our oxygen cylinders are almost empty; treatment costs too hefty,

Our nurses are now exhausted, tired; our youth unemployed and fired,

Please let us live just one more day, please now you have to go away.

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The Love That Wasn’t Meant To Be Easy

If loving you was easy,

I wouldn’t have been standing alone on a full moon night,

There wouldn’t be a constant, weary search in my eyes,

Sleeps would have meant tranquility and not just a means to escape,

And I wouldn’t keep hoping for you to come, knowing that you wouldn’t.

If loving you was easy,

I wouldn’t have felt pain watching those two lovers by the street,

My music wouldn’t be only about endless waits and betrayals,

The kohl in my eyes and the lipstick on lips would have looked merrier,

And I wouldn’t keep hoping for you to come, knowing that you wouldn’t.

If loving you was easy,

My laughter wouldn’t have sounded so full of fatigue,

My friends wouldn’t always be asking, “Are you okay?”,

Every time that I went to a new café, I wouldn’t have been scared of spotting you with her,

And I wouldn’t keep hoping for you to come, knowing that you wouldn’t.

The truth is if loving you was easy,

My heart wouldn’t grow strong and immune to enduring pain,

I wouldn’t have learnt to cuddle myself to sleep,

I wouldn’t have worn that dress for myself, knowing that you won’t even see me,

After that dark night alone, I wouldn’t have been able to wake myself the next day and make myself a cup of coffee;

And I wouldn’t have the strength to wait for you, knowing that you might never come.

Yes, loving you was not easy.

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